What’s the deal with plaid shorts? At some point in the recent past they were declared ‘it’. When I went to The Bay to look for a plain pair of shorts I felt like I had entered Plaid World. There were racks upon racks of plaid shorts in every possible color and configuration, a veritable sea of plaid to drown in. Oh sure, I found a few token pairs of non-plaid shorts for people who just have to be different and buck the current trend being dictated to us by…uh…whoever is responsible for starting the whole thing. I’d love to have a specific name so I could write a letter. I’d never send the letter but it would feel good writing it.
The non-plaid pairs of shorts came only in two sizes: giant and elephantine, because apparently the average male now has a waist similar to a water buffalo and those who eat reasonably and exercise and thus have a regular-sized waist are a minority that will take what they can get and like it, dammit. I left the store sans shorts (except for the ones I was wearing when I came in. I am not an indecent man, after all).
On a similar note, can someone please declare 3D in movies ‘not it’. This has to be the most unwelcome trend in theaters since they started showing commercials. It’s such a crass move to squeeze even more money from the shrinking theater-going audience. I think I preferred the rumble seats some theaters had when they played Earthquake back in 1974.