Even though the story is dumb, it’s still a story and I like progressing through the different areas
It’s perversely fun to hit the space bar every time Azmodan or Scary Image of Azmodan appears and starts talking, only to get out about one word before going away. For reference, he constantly taunts the player until you kill him and every word he utters is written as channelled through a 15-year-old hardcore Diablo fan with very big ideas of what makes a cool villain, with all of those ideas being wrong and awful.
I’m actually plowing through it very quickly, so I’ll be sated soon
That’s how much gold my Season 24 wizard Blastbury has piled up in Diablo 3.
Am I done with the game now? I think…I’m pretty close. This time for real! I’ve gotten to the point where I’m getting four of every legendary item. This makes them feel more off-the-rack than legendary. I’ve done all the bounties repeatedly. I’ve done enough rifts that I would spontaneously name my child Rift if I had one. Tyrael has thanked me a thousand times for making the world safer. I’ve heard every stupid thing the enchantress says countless times over.
If there is anything left that I haven’t seen, I can’t say I feel I’ve missed out.
I’ll transfer stuff to the non-season stash when Season 24 ends on December 5th. And then, just maybe…I’ll uninstall the game, forcing myself to fill [Diablo 3 time] with [something else].
Yesterday I made my umpteenth attempt to get the Gibbering Gemstone in order to complete the Staff of Herding, my arbitrary end goal for Season 23 of Diablo 3.
I entered Bastion’s Keep Stronghold in Act III, as I had many times before. I chose the Bridge of Korsikk waypoint, found the Caverns of Frost and once again made my way to level 2 and there was Chiltara, ready to deny me again with the silly 5% drop rate of the gemstone.
Except this time it actually dropped.
I made the Staff of Herding, visited Whimsyshire, collected some loot and gold, then teleported back to town, where I cleared out everything in inventory except:
Gems, including legendary (upgradable) gems
Any items that had no level requirements
Any unique items (typically for crafting things like the Staff of Herding or the actual staff itself)
Level 70 rings and amulets
Level 70 set pieces
Level 70 ancient legendary items
This sounds like a lot of stuff, but it actually reduced my inventory from about eight tabs cluttered with stuff down to less than three. I am now officially prepared for the end of Season 23, having sated my made-up requirements, but it apparently doesn’t end until July 23 or something, more than a month from now. No matter. At that point, I will uninstall the game, lest it continue to distract me from other things. The time for virtual comfort food is ending.
Soon™.
UPDATE: How could I not include a shot of Spellsworth looking pretty in purple? (Also up to 383 million gold now.)
When last we left him, my Diablo 3 wizard Spellsworth was cruising through rifts and bounties at Torment VI (not V, as I mistakenly reported), focusing especially on an Act III location for a rare drop, the gibbering gemstone. This is the final piece needed to create The Staff of Herding, which opens up the cow level.
Alas, the gemstone, with only a 5% drop rate, and on a spawn that does not always appear in the Caverns of Frost, has yet to materialize.
In the meantime, Spellsworth has killed three gilded barons (treasure goblins that just carry huge sacks of gold) and slayed another that opened up a portal upon death to Whimsyshire, a cartoon land that also showers riches on you. He’s also been to The Vault, which, as name suggests, has a lot of gold in it.
This is to say that Spellsworth now has a lot of gold now, about 243 million or so. I am quite certain this is peanuts compared to truly hardcore players, but it is way more than I have any use for. The most expensive activity in the game is crafting and upgrading gems and Spellsworth has already maxed out his gems as far as they can go…and still has that 243 million left.
And yet.
And yet, I still like seeing that number go up. Wouldn’t it be nice to have an even 250 million gold? And then shoot for 500 million? How about a billion? I don’t need it, but somehow I want it and I will relentlessly pursue the goal, while offering thin excuses (“I just want the Staff of Herding, that is totes it!”) to justify this mad, senseless accumulation of unneeded wealth.
And so I see myself emulating the super rich, never needing more but always wanting more.
Perhaps the solution is to uninstall the game. I could always re-install later, but uninstalling at least creates some friction for getting me back on this pointless treadmill of virtual massing of riches.
The allure of more when more is wholly unnecessary is surprisingly strong, though. I’ll check back with an update in a week or so and we’ll see if I’ve fought back this demon of avarice, or made him my chummy roommate.
UPDATE LATER THAT SAME DAY: Now at 253 million gold
Spellsworth is my Season 23 wizard in Diablo 3. I got him to level 70, completed the four chapters of the season and got all six pieces of his armor set. He is now a machine of unbridled destruction. I play at Torment V, which is fairly low on the Torment scale, so he melts stuff pretty effortlessly, but he piles up oodles of gold and plowing through hordes of demons remains strangely soothing.
I think my latest obsessive turn in Diablo 3 will be ending soon, though. I want to make the Staff of Herding (again) and visit the cow level one more time, then I think retirement to a nice wizard castle may be in order.
After that I’ll consider one of the other 700* games I have in my backlog.
* this is not an exaggeration. I’ve been busy…accumulating cheap or free games
I was originally planning on updating my PC this spring but thanks to crypto currency miners driving the price of video cards into orbit I’ve decided to hold off and peruse my massive backlog of games for titles that will still run on my current rig, which is about four years old.
Instead I started playing Diablo 3 again. Like World of Warcraft, it acts as comfort food because it’s pretty mindless. You click, things die. You click more, more things die. You get loot. Your character gets increasingly ridiculous looking. It’s fun. Since I last placed (coincidentally four years ago) they’ve added seasons, which locks your character into a “start over” mode that gives you a few trinkets and baubles for completing various goals. I’ve completed one of nine goals. I probably won’t finish them all and I will be sad, but only a little, because there’s good clickin’ fun in the meantime.
I’m almost worried that Diablo 3 is now distracting me from my writing the same way WoW was. Don’t ask about my writing…