Gaming

My detailed analysis on the proposed Microsoft purchase of Activision Blizzard for US $68.7 billion

mosaic alien on wall
Photo by Francesco Ungaro on Pexels.com

First, what does it say about me that when I see “analysis” in the title, the anal part leaps out? Does this make me a perv? A butt fetishist? I can’t answer these questions, only raise them.

On the subject of Microsoft buying Activision Blizzard for $68.7 billion, a few thoughts in list form:

  • That’s a lot of money.
  • Really, think about what this says about the size of the video games industry. I remember when the home market crashed in 1983 and some thought it would all go away, that we’d go back to checkers and playing outside. Haha, nope!
  • People thought Microsoft was silly for paying $2 billion for Minecraft, but that game manufactures money. I would not have predicted that from the early alpha days of 2011. So maybe close to $70 billion for an entire passel of games (and tech and employees) will pay off sooner than you might expect, too.
  • The conventional wisdom is this will clean up the rotten, frat boy culture in Activision Blizzard’s executive suite, because most of them will be ejected once the deal is complete and Phil Spenser assumes control as Xbox CEO. The downer part is most of these cretins will get fat rewards on the way out, essentially getting away with it.
  • Still, better that they’re gone in the end.
  • I still don’t care about the five million different Call of Duty games, and suspect I never will.
  • I am, however, interested in certain Blizzard games becoming available on Game Pass. Specifically, I’m interested in playing but not actually buying Diablo II: Resurrected, so this deal is really about saving me $54.99 before tax.
  • I might try World of Warcraft again. Maybe.
  • This will make it easier to play Diablo IV with a clear conscience, assuming it’s actually good. Mind you, improving on the story of Diablo III is a pretty low bar.
  • Possible modern version of Rock and Roll Racing.

Cat on ice: The movie

It turns out there’s actually a video of perhaps my favorite animated gif ever. A former co-worker had it come up as a recommended video for him and shared the link, for which I am joyously grateful because this is the best cat.

I would be remiss to not include the gif as well:

Welcome to 1993 (again), courtesy of Grandpa Apple

Apple has awarded the 2021 Mac Game of the Year Award to…

Myst.

Yes, the same game that came out in 1993 for the Mac. This is a full 3D version of the game, but it’s still got all the same puzzles, so it’s really just a nicer-looking version of the same game that came out 28 years ago and ran on System 7.

Is it fair to say this sums up gaming on Macs? Not entirely, but more than a little. Kind of embarrassing, considering there were better contemporary games that could have been highlighted. Apple is devolving into the corporate equivalent of the dad-soon-to-be-grandpa who’s grown conservative, has questionable taste and likes his food packaged and processed, not that hippie natural stuff.

One billion gold

That’s how much gold my Season 24 wizard Blastbury has piled up in Diablo 3.

Am I done with the game now? I think…I’m pretty close. This time for real! I’ve gotten to the point where I’m getting four of every legendary item. This makes them feel more off-the-rack than legendary. I’ve done all the bounties repeatedly. I’ve done enough rifts that I would spontaneously name my child Rift if I had one. Tyrael has thanked me a thousand times for making the world safer. I’ve heard every stupid thing the enchantress says countless times over.

If there is anything left that I haven’t seen, I can’t say I feel I’ve missed out.

I’ll transfer stuff to the non-season stash when Season 24 ends on December 5th. And then, just maybe…I’ll uninstall the game, forcing myself to fill [Diablo 3 time] with [something else].

I will update in six days.

Games of video

Video games or videogames?

Which is it? Does it matter?

FAKE EDIT: My in-browser grammar checker has flagged “videogames” as wrong and bad and since this happened on the internet it must be true. Question settled.

Next question: Are video games real? When I first played Pong (I am old) it seemed kind of unreal (not to be confused with the video game), but I’m pretty sure I was not in some kind of holographic reality at the time. Although it was the 1970s, so who can say for sure?

Anyway, when I think of Intellivision (a video game console from the late 70s), my thumbs still hurt thinking about that horrible disc controller. It was horrible.

This concludes my thesis on video games.

Diablo II: Resurrected thoughts and things

I played the recent open beta of Diablo II: Resurrected, the gussied-up version of the now 21-year-old Blizzard game, and have some thoughts.

Note: I am not unaware that Blizzard as a company is a bit of a dumpster fire at the moment, with lots of stories coming out about a toxic work culture that has spawned multiple sexual harassment lawsuits. For this post I’m just sticking to the game (except at the very end).

First, D2 is surprisingly pretty. If you hit the G key in-game, it will toggle you between the original 800×600 graphics and the fancy new version:

The player characters and NPCs have all been redone as 3D models and look good. The druid and others no longer walk with a “I have to pee really badly!” animation. And as you can see above, the whole world has been lovingly redone with more detailed, higher-resolution textures.

The sound and music, always excellent, remain untouched.

A few modern updates to the game have been made–note the re-arrangement of the action bar into something more befitting a modern game. You can also choose to auto-pick up gold. There’s a generous shared stash that eliminates the need for mule characters.

But as I played the through the first few quests, the one thing that struck me the most–and what hasn’t changed from the original–is the tiny inventory. In the early game especially, gold is precious and you want to sell everything you don’t use, but your inventory fills up so quickly that you will need to portal (or walk) back to the rogue encampment multiple times to sell all the junk you’ve been carrying. This gets tedious really quickly and could have been solved by increasing the size of the inventory. It doesn’t need to be doubled or tripled, just enough that you could, say, do one quest and not have your inventory overflowing multiple times just getting to the quest. But the devs have drawn arbitrary lines in the sand on what they will and won’t change.

Also, there is the price, which is $54.99 Canadian. Again, despite the improvements, this is a 21-year-old game.

Just this week, another revised version of Myst came out. This one is on an entirely new engine (Unreal), offers a fully 3D world with free movement and also includes VR support. Myst is one of the best-selling games of all time. The new version is selling for $33.99.

Blizzard is grossly overvaluing Diablo II. Yes, some people–a lot of people–will buy it regardless of price. I’m not one of them. Given how stingy Blizzard is with sales, it will be a long time before it reaches what I consider a reasonable price–if ever.

And then there is the train wreck that the company is currently, and would I buy the game even if it was $33.99? And the answer is no, I wouldn’t. Not now. I’ll need a better price and evidence that Blizzard is changing its ways as a company before I give them more money.

But Diablo II: Resurrected is pretty. I’ll give them that.

Another important update on Diablo 3 and the ongoing quest for the Staff of Herding as sought by Spellsworth, the best wizard to wear magic pants

Yesterday I made my umpteenth attempt to get the Gibbering Gemstone in order to complete the Staff of Herding, my arbitrary end goal for Season 23 of Diablo 3.

I entered Bastion’s Keep Stronghold in Act III, as I had many times before. I chose the Bridge of Korsikk waypoint, found the Caverns of Frost and once again made my way to level 2 and there was Chiltara, ready to deny me again with the silly 5% drop rate of the gemstone.

Except this time it actually dropped.

I made the Staff of Herding, visited Whimsyshire, collected some loot and gold, then teleported back to town, where I cleared out everything in inventory except:

  • Gems, including legendary (upgradable) gems
  • Any items that had no level requirements
  • Any unique items (typically for crafting things like the Staff of Herding or the actual staff itself)
  • Level 70 rings and amulets
  • Level 70 set pieces
  • Level 70 ancient legendary items

This sounds like a lot of stuff, but it actually reduced my inventory from about eight tabs cluttered with stuff down to less than three. I am now officially prepared for the end of Season 23, having sated my made-up requirements, but it apparently doesn’t end until July 23 or something, more than a month from now. No matter. At that point, I will uninstall the game, lest it continue to distract me from other things. The time for virtual comfort food is ending.

Soon™.

UPDATE: How could I not include a shot of Spellsworth looking pretty in purple? (Also up to 383 million gold now.)

Diablo 3 helped me understand the rich

When last we left him, my Diablo 3 wizard Spellsworth was cruising through rifts and bounties at Torment VI (not V, as I mistakenly reported), focusing especially on an Act III location for a rare drop, the gibbering gemstone. This is the final piece needed to create The Staff of Herding, which opens up the cow level.

Alas, the gemstone, with only a 5% drop rate, and on a spawn that does not always appear in the Caverns of Frost, has yet to materialize.

In the meantime, Spellsworth has killed three gilded barons (treasure goblins that just carry huge sacks of gold) and slayed another that opened up a portal upon death to Whimsyshire, a cartoon land that also showers riches on you. He’s also been to The Vault, which, as name suggests, has a lot of gold in it.

This is to say that Spellsworth now has a lot of gold now, about 243 million or so. I am quite certain this is peanuts compared to truly hardcore players, but it is way more than I have any use for. The most expensive activity in the game is crafting and upgrading gems and Spellsworth has already maxed out his gems as far as they can go…and still has that 243 million left.

And yet.

And yet, I still like seeing that number go up. Wouldn’t it be nice to have an even 250 million gold? And then shoot for 500 million? How about a billion? I don’t need it, but somehow I want it and I will relentlessly pursue the goal, while offering thin excuses (“I just want the Staff of Herding, that is totes it!”) to justify this mad, senseless accumulation of unneeded wealth.

And so I see myself emulating the super rich, never needing more but always wanting more.

Perhaps the solution is to uninstall the game. I could always re-install later, but uninstalling at least creates some friction for getting me back on this pointless treadmill of virtual massing of riches.

The allure of more when more is wholly unnecessary is surprisingly strong, though. I’ll check back with an update in a week or so and we’ll see if I’ve fought back this demon of avarice, or made him my chummy roommate.

UPDATE LATER THAT SAME DAY: Now at 253 million gold

Spellsworth is amazing

Spellsworth is my Season 23 wizard in Diablo 3. I got him to level 70, completed the four chapters of the season and got all six pieces of his armor set. He is now a machine of unbridled destruction. I play at Torment V, which is fairly low on the Torment scale, so he melts stuff pretty effortlessly, but he piles up oodles of gold and plowing through hordes of demons remains strangely soothing.

I think my latest obsessive turn in Diablo 3 will be ending soon, though. I want to make the Staff of Herding (again) and visit the cow level one more time, then I think retirement to a nice wizard castle may be in order.

After that I’ll consider one of the other 700* games I have in my backlog.

* this is not an exaggeration. I’ve been busy…accumulating cheap or free games

I am an official C# programmer

I wrote “Hello world!” in C#. I’m adding C# to my resume now.

(This is part of a bigger plan that will hopefully come to fruition this year. More details soon, possibly in the next post if I’m not lazy or distracted.)

Let’s see if I can remember the code:

Console.Writeline("Hello world");

Fake edit: I checked and forgot to capitalize the L in Line, which would have produced an error, since C# is case-sensitive. But I remembered that it’s case-sensitive!

Also, this is the most coding I’ve done in like ten years.

Minecraft of yore (circa 2011)

While I am currently battling sheep taking over all the rowboats, an online gaming pal linked to a video of a world a bunch of us worked on back in 2011. My notable contributions include the rainbow house, the giant creeper statue and the absurdly long underwater rail tunnel.

Good times.

Except now I really want to go back to that map and have no idea if such a thing is possible. Probably not.

So, melancholy times.

Back to Minecraft…and sheep

Somehow I got hooked into Minecraft again and so much has been added in the years since I’ve played that it feels like a modded game without the pesky need to install mods.

I’m currently nurturing a few worlds in their early stages and the shot below is from the Survival Island seed. As the name suggests, it starts you out on an island in an ocean dotted by islands. After some initial work on the starting island I moved to a larger and flatter island where I began setting up shop. I built a rowboat to get around and when not in use I leave it on the shore near my humble home.

One day I discovered a sheep was in it. I left it, thinking it would move on. It did not. I then sheared it, thinking this might prompt it to leave. It did not.

The sheep in question

I then tried to use the boat, thinking that this would definitely get the sheep to move. It did not.

Conveniently, though, I could still use the rowboat with the sheep in it, so I began cruising the ocean with a naked sheep in tow.

When I came back later, I as greeted by this:

The same sheep, now shorn, with a new friend to sail with, the cow

The seafaring life was apparently not for the cow, though, as it eventually moved on. The sheep is a permanent fixture of my rowboat, though. I mean, why not?

(by the way, the textures I’m using are BDCraft. The Java version can be found here: BDCraft.net