Vancouver Pride Parade 2011

Last year I vowed not to return to watch the Pride Parade unless I could drag someone along to suffer with me. Who knew I’d find someone? Even better, my partner Jeff is a Pride Parade virgin. After expressing a desire to go I cautioned him that we would need to arrive early in order to find a place to sit, as standing was Very Bad.

We arrived later than planned but did indeed find a spot to sit about three blocks past the start of the parade route. Though it had rained earlier in the morning, by parade start the sky was clearing and it was a perfectly warm 21ºC. The parade began right on time and shortly after it did I came to realize the girls sitting directly in front of us (on the sidewalk curb) were Screamers. They screamed at most everything. They were also Grabbers. Any time a person strode by offering a cheap bead necklace, card, candy or condoms their hands were thrust out and waved around like flags urgently calling for surrender, except in this case they were asking the parade participants to surrender their loot to them. They made off with a pretty good haul.

The BC Liberals were once again absent.

Most of the left-leaning parties were represented, though the Conservatives and NPA also returned. Hedy Fry was again on hand after narrowly winning re-election in May. This time she was dressed merely in a silver sparkly gown, with no hint of power armor or alien headdress.

Spencer Chandra Herbert was again present and was as adorable-looking as ever. Elizabeth May always looks like she’s having the best time ever, kind of like a happy drunk. Vancouver Mayor Gregor Robertson is somewhat the same. He wore a snazzy shirt.

Crazy Naked Guy did not return. I wonder if perhaps he is now wandering happy and naked in the Great Beyond now. Or got arrested after last year’s parade.

I had predicted five floats of men in underwear and turned out to be under, as there were at least six — and that was with the Odyssey’s absence this year.

Again, the parade seemed to run out of gas in the last 15 minutes and Nic’s VGVA group was dead last instead of being merely third-from-last like in 2010. Here’s a great close-up of Nic lurching after an errant volleyball. Great except for that fat head in the way, a recurring theme in my photos given where I was sitting.

Despite making no effort to secure any loot myself I still came away with three items: a leaflet from the BC Civil Liberties Association (actually three of them — do I give off a civil liberties vibe or something?), a leaflet for a play called Bare: A Pop Opera (“He’s wearing glasses, I bet he goes to the theater!”) and finally a big blueberry gumball which I did not technically receive, as it bounced off my shoulder and landed in front of me. Jeff took it to help fight his morning mouth.

I will say this — having someone along, especially your partner — makes for a much better experience. I also greatly preferred a sore butt after sitting on concrete for nearly three hours vs. the sore back from years past. I still say they could knock a good 15 minutes off the parade and not lose much.

Fireworks 2011: China

With summer making a half-hearted appearance this year the opening night of the Celebration of Light fireworks was looking like it might be a little damp, with a few errant drops of rain falling shortly before the show was to begin at 10 p.m. Fortunately the deluge never arrived and we were able to watch China’s entry without getting soggy.

We assembled just south of the Innukshuk while it was still light, setting up on one section of the recently restored seawall. Apart from a smoker who occasionally lit up with one of his Designed-To-Find-And-Taunt-Non-Smokers cigarettes the crowd was well-behaved, even enthusiastic. As the intermittent rain fell I opted to leave Nic and his friends briefly to meet up with Jeff who was en-route, as he was bringing my kangaroo jacket (no, it’s not a hoodie, dammit). I walked along English Bay beach and the foot traffic grew more congested until it became something akin to that molasses in January thing. At the same time a stunt pilot was conducting silly and daring tricks over the bay and I, having the kind of mind I do, thought about how one of his tricks would tragically backfire and he’d come straight into the crowd I was trapped in the middle of.

That did not happen.

Instead, we watched a spectacular and dazzling Chinese show. Knock them for that whole communism/lead-in-everything stuff but darned if they don’t know how to put on an impressive fireworks display. The crowd left thoroughly sated.

Perhaps even more impressively, Jeff and I walked to the Waterfront SkyTrain station and still managed to get home before midnight, earlier than I had managed last year — and I was traveling within Vancouver that time, not out to the ‘burbs. Our SkyTrain trip was made further delightful by a foursome of Surrey youth who fit the stereotype to the letter. I mean, we are talking straight out of Casting 101 here. I say no more.

All in all, a pleasant evening.

The worst game show ever

Last night, post-run we turned the TV on whilst relaxing. ABC was airing a game show called 101 Ways to Leave a Game Show. Had it been compressed into its actual meaningful bits the show would have run maybe five minutes, tops. Instead, it dragged on for a full hour before reaching an abrupt conclusion that barely left time for the fast-scrolling closing credits.

It was horrible enough to watch once in order to mock it later. Later is now.

The contestants must answer what the Wikipedia link above generously describes as an ‘educated guess question’, which usually amounts to trivia that most people would be pretty clueless on (the most hot dogs eaten in a hot dog-eating contest, etc.) The one who answers the most incorrectly (“3 million hot dogs!”) gets ejected from the show in some violent physical manner, such as being tied to an anchor and being dragged off a dock (ignore the fleeting glimpse you see of the rescue boat appearing moments after the person is dunked). To make matters worse, some questions have multiple answers provided and the contestants must choose the correct answers while avoiding the one incorrect one–except one of the contestants is randomly forced to take that wrong answer as his or her choice. I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed such idiotic game rule design.

In the episode that we watched one segment had the contestants suspended on ropes over the back of a boat. To add ‘drama’ a series of shots featuring a shark fin were shown and the trying-too-hard host pours ‘chum’ into the water to attract said sharks, the implication being that the losing contestant will be summarily devoured by said maneaters. This ignores the fact that the boat continues to speed well past the place where the ‘chum’ is dropped and if the contestants actually got eaten by sharks the producers would be serving time, not inflicting us with this imbecilic charade.

And that’s it, really–the send-offs for the losing contestants seem vaguely mean-spirited and borderline dangerous. The questions are useless trivia that don’t actually test a contestant’s intelligence in any meaningful way. Sticking random contestants with losing answers defeats any pretense to drama. As I said in the title, worst game show ever. Next time I’m resting post-run I’m going to play Bejeweled 2 on my iPhone.

The after five run

Distance: 11.15 km
Weather: Cloudy
Temp: 17ºC
Wind: light
Calories burned: 779
Average pace: 5:10/km
Total distance to date: 922 km

After 5 p.m. and after five days off, to be exact.

I hadn’t planned on five days off but my shins were feeling tender (though it’s never hurt for walking or post-run) so when my schedule didn’t line up for a run at the usual time I decided to give myself a little extra recovery time.

I returned to Burnaby Lake under a dreary gray sky (standard fare this summer). There was some slight humidity but nothing like the last run. My legs felt a big creaky, I had some light, persistent cramping but stamina was not an issue and overall I did about as expected given the time off, finishing with a 5:10/km pace — my second best time overall.

Prior to the run I had received two new mosquito bites on my left calf. I think these were from Amazonian mosquitoes or something because these suckers (ho ho) itched like nobody’s business.  Jeff slathered the bites with calamine and then dusted both legs with some Off to insure further bites would not occur. The good news is the number of bites did indeed remain constant. The bad news is each step taken with my left foot jarred the calf and the bites and was a source of irritation. Now imagine how many times you step over the course of 11.15 km. Yeah.

The trail was sparsely populated, no surprise given the weather. I had one encounter with an IEDO (ill-educated dog owner). Ahead of me was a couple with their dog — unleashed (bad!) on their left. Normally I pass on the non-dog side but this time there was more room on the left and the dog seemed to be moving on a steady, predictable course. As I got close the woman turned to the dog and, seeing me, suddenly called its name. The dog immediately froze in place, which happened to be directly in front of me. I nearly ran into it but managed to nimbly skirt to the left just in time. Had the woman said nothing I would have passed without incident. Had the dog been properly leashed nothing would have happened. People!

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise; purple = Burnaby Lake):

km Jul 27 Jul 20 Jul 17 Jul 14 Jul 11 Jul 9 Jul 6 Jul 4 Jul 1
1 km 4:56 4:53 4:56 4:45 4:54 4:58 5:08 4:58 5:04
2 km 4:54 4:56 4:54 4:47 4:56 4:58 5:11 5:02 5:06
3 km 4:55 4:58 4:56 4:51 4:58 5:03 5:14 5:08 5:07
4 km 4:56 5:00 4:58 4:54 5:01 5:07 5:17 5:12 5:09
5 km 5:00 5:01 5:00 4:54 5:03 5:10 5:20 5:14 5:11
6 km 5:02 5:02 5:02 4:59 5:03 5:12 5:22 5:15 5:12
7 km 5:04 5:03 5:04 5:00 5:04 5:15 5:25 5:17 5:14
8 km 5:06 5:05 5:06 5:02 5:06 5:17 5:27 5:19 5:16
9 km 5:07 5:06 5:08 5:04 5:08 5:19 5:30 5:21 5:17
10 km 5:09 5:06 5:09 5:06 5:10 5:20 5:31 5:21 5:17
11 km 5:10 — 5:10 5:01 4:59 — — — 5:19

 

 

The return to China Creek run

Distance: 10.02 km
Weather: Cloudy
Temp: 17ºC
Wind: light with occasional gusts
Calories burned: 701
Average pace: 5:06/km
Total distance to date: 911 km

After three fast runs at Burnaby Lake I returned to the familiar stomping grounds of China Creek park for today’s run. With the temperature in the early evening hovering around 17ºC and the sky overcast, there was no chance of overheating. As is usually the case in summer (technically it is summer, despite the weather) there were dual baseball games in session. Ominously as I started the run the very first ball struck landed close to the trail. Fortunately that would be the only one.

I started out strong but was curious to see if my improved pace was the change of scenery or if I was really just running faster. Due to possibly sleeping funny last night my left leg felt a bit janky in a few spots it normally doesn’t, around the hip and upper thigh but it was very minor. My calves and shins both felt it during much of the run but it was more ‘yep, those are my muscles getting worked out’ than ‘OMG the flesh is tearing from the bone and I shall soon crumple in a heap’. I was walking fine after the run so I’m hoping I am still working the legs hard without actually injuring them.

I felt stronger in the second half of the run, with my stamina holding up nicely and that’s reflected in the times as I only lost five seconds between 5 and 10 km. In the end I matched my best pace to date at 5:06/km — 11 full seconds than my previous best at China Creek. I am tentatively ready to say my overall pace has just plain improved, though maybe the runs at Burnaby Lake provided incentive/inspiration to pick up the pace.

There was a guy doing a pretty intense workout that showed up about halfway through my run. His face reminded me of a young Clark Kent and he had man boobs that looked like they had been sculpted from granite. I was a little jealous.

Irony: ball players sitting around and smoking after their game has ended.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise; purple = Burnaby Lake):

km Jul 20 Jul 17 Jul 14 Jul 11 Jul 9 Jul 6 Jul 4 Jul 1 Jun 28
1 km 4:53 4:56 4:45 4:54 4:58 5:08 4:58 5:04 4:58
2 km 4:56 4:54 4:47 4:56 4:58 5:11 5:02 5:06 5:03
3 km 4:58 4:56 4:51 4:58 5:03 5:14 5:08 5:07 5:05
4 km 5:00 4:58 4:54 5:01 5:07 5:17 5:12 5:09 5:08
5 km 5:01 5:00 4:54 5:03 5:10 5:20 5:14 5:11 5:11
6 km 5:02 5:02 4:59 5:03 5:12 5:22 5:15 5:12 5:13
7 km 5:03 5:04 5:00 5:04 5:15 5:25 5:17 5:14 5:15
8 km 5:05 5:06 5:02 5:06 5:17 5:27 5:19 5:16 5:16
9 km 5:06 5:08 5:04 5:08 5:19 5:30 5:21 5:17 5:18
10 km 5:06 5:09 5:06 5:10 5:20 5:31 5:21 5:17 5:19
11 km — 5:10 5:01 4:59 — — — 5:19 —

It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity run

Distance: 11.29 km
Weather: Overcast, light drizzle
Temp: 19ºC
Wind: none
Calories burned: 789
Average pace: 5:10/km
Total distance to date: 901 km

Today I completed the third part of my Burnaby Lake loop trilogy after a couple of days’ rest and achieved two new milestones (or kilometerstones as we call them in Canada):

  • I officially passed 900 km on the Nike+
  • Had my longest run to date at 11.29 km

The conditions were a fair bit different for today’s run vs. that of Thursday. To wit:

  • I ran in the early afternoon (1 p.m.) instead of the evening
  • I ran on only one meal instead of three
  • There was absolutely no wind at all
  • It was extremely humid
  • The slugs had mysteriously vanished
  • I ran past a horse

The run was much harder than the previous one and at times I really felt myself laboring to continue but I pressed on and even ran an extra (but short) leg just to make sure it would be my longest run to date, if not the quickest.

I still finished the 10K portion with a second best-ever pace of 5:09/km and an overall pace of 5:10 (or 5:11 depending on which part of Nike+ you believe), so my performance was still good despite the struggle. My shins are feeling a bit tender now but I am unsure if it’s due to the intensity of the runs or if they’re getting hurt. I’ll know better tomorrow on my day off.

One of the important things here, I think, is to not run after just a single meal (breakfast). After the run my caloric intake for the day is actually negative as I burn off all the calories from breakfast and then some. This would be handy if I was trying to lose weight, but I’m not. I’ll also keep in mind the conditions at Burnaby Lake for future runs there. There was a heavy rain yesterday and today the air was thick, warm and heavy — very unappealing for a run. I sweated not unlike the proverbial pig.

Interestingly, I had a rare instance of my second km being faster than my first. No idea how that happened.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km Jul 17 Jul 14 Jul 11 Jul 9 Jul 6 Jul 4 Jul 1 Jun 28 Jun 26
1 km 4:56 4:45 4:54 4:58 5:08 4:58 5:04 4:58 4:59
2 km 4:54 4:47 4:56 4:58 5:11 5:02 5:06 5:03 5:05
3 km 4:56 4:51 4:58 5:03 5:14 5:08 5:07 5:05 5:10
4 km 4:58 4:54 5:01 5:07 5:17 5:12 5:09 5:08 5:13
5 km 5:00 4:54 5:03 5:10 5:20 5:14 5:11 5:11 5:15
6 km 5:02 4:59 5:03 5:12 5:22 5:15 5:12 5:13 5:19
7 km 5:04 5:00 5:04 5:15 5:25 5:17 5:14 5:15 5:21
8 km 5:06 5:02 5:06 5:17 5:27 5:19 5:16 5:16 5:23
9 km 5:08 5:04 5:08 5:19 5:30 5:21 5:17 5:18 5:25
10 km 5:09 5:06 5:10 5:20 5:31 5:21 5:17 5:19 5:27
11 km 5:10 5:01 4:59 — — — 5:19 — —

Slug run 2: Electric Boogaloo

Distance: 11.05 km
Weather: Overcast, light drizzle
Temp: 16ºC
Wind: light breeze
Calories burned: 772
Average pace: 5:06/km
Total distance to date: 889 km

I look forward to doing it again, though I suspect it will be awhile before I can beat my 5:10 pace.

As it turned out, ‘awhile’ ended up being three days later, as I repeated the Burnaby Lake loop under similar conditions (overcast, early evening) and ended up shaving another four seconds off my average pace, bringing it down to a spiffy 5:06/km. This is also the first time I’ve finished 6 km with a pace of under 5 minutes.

I successfully dodged another army of black slugs. Apparently they project some kind of field that repels feet because I have yet to see one that has been squashed.

The highlight of tonight’s run, apart from the general zippiness, is that I successfully avoided the wrong turns of the first run, meaning the only pavement I saw was the brief mandatory sprint across a small parking lot as you come around toward the long southern stretch of the trail. Toward the end a light drizzle began to fall but it was kind of nice run-wise, even if it served to remind me that summer has been off to a hobbling start around these parts.

Just before the 1 km mark I had a USI (Untied Lace Incident) and shortly after addressing that I had a SBI (Swallowed Bug Incident). I’m pretty sure I swallowed a bug. Maybe even a couple of them. For the next few km I tried clearing my throat, coughing and carrying on to dislodge whatever got lodged in my windpipe. Fortunately this was on the part of the trail that moves away from the bog so I did not ingest yet more bugs as I worked to remove the ones already inside.

I did not pass any other joggers running the same way this time, though I did pass by a number of others running clockwise, including a large group of young guys that reminded me of those junior high P.E. runs where you had the few hardcore up front, a large middle group and a few stragglers usually walking far at the back with that ‘What, me exercise?’ attitude happening. The part that bugs me is even the guys in the latter group have incredibly toned bodies. No fair, I say.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km Jul 14 Jul 11 Jul 9 Jul 6 Jul 4 Jul 1 Jun 28 Jun 26 Jun 21
1 km 4:45 4:54 4:58 5:08 4:58 5:04 4:58 4:59 5:00
2 km 4:47 4:56 4:58 5:11 5:02 5:06 5:03 5:05 5:04
3 km 4:51 4:58 5:03 5:14 5:08 5:07 5:05 5:10 5:07
4 km 4:54 5:01 5:07 5:17 5:12 5:09 5:08 5:13 5:11
5 km 4:54 5:03 5:10 5:20 5:14 5:11 5:11 5:15 5:14
6 km 4:59 5:03 5:12 5:22 5:15 5:12 5:13 5:19 5:15
7 km 5:00 5:04 5:15 5:25 5:17 5:14 5:15 5:21 5:17
8 km 5:02 5:06 5:17 5:27 5:19 5:16 5:16 5:23 5:19
9 km 5:04 5:08 5:19 5:30 5:21 5:17 5:18 5:25 5:20
10 km 5:06 5:10 5:20 5:31 5:21 5:17 5:19 5:27 5:21
11 km 5:01 4:59 — — — 5:19

Bad running weather: the list

Here is a list of the worst types of weather to run in, according to me (since I’m the one who has to run in it), from least worst to worst worst:

14. Overcast and light breeze. This is actually ideal conditions. It is usually never too cold or warm when the weather is like this.
13. Moderate wind. Moderate wind can be a tad annoying, especially if I don’t have my cap on securely.
12. Warm sun. If it’s warm, I get hot and sweaty but it’s manageable.
11. Light rain. The only issue with light rain is that sometimes my iPod gets wet straight through my shorts’ pocket.
10. Snow. I’ve only run once in light snow and it was fun. I’m thinking a foot of snow would probably be less so.
9. Cold rain. Cold rain means cold hands and if you wear gloves they need to be waterproof.
8. Hard rain. Getting soaked to the skin is kind of refreshing. Unfortunately if it’s raining hard, it’s almost always cold, too. Not so refreshing. iPod also gets drenched.
7. Hail. I’ve never run in hail. I imagine getting pelted with little ice rocks is less than pleasant.
6. Extreme cold. I’ve run in sub-freezing conditions and been fine. I’m thinking Arctic tundra-type cold here.
5. Heavy wind. The resistance means you work a lot harder to achieve the same result and my cap has to be on tight enough to cut off circulation so it doesn’t fly away.
4. Hot sun. I wilt on hot days. My body feels like a furnace and I’m left parched as all get-out. Dry mouth and lips are yucky.
3. Hard rain and heavy wind. Likeliest weather to make me wonder to myself, ‘What was I thinking?’ when on the run.
2. Hot sun and heavy wind. Heat dries you out, the wind makes it harder to run and dries you out even more. Bleah.

And the worst weather to run in is:

1. Dogs. See here.

The slug run (at Burnaby Lake)

Distance: 11.21 km
Weather: Sun, cloud, light shower
Temp: 17ºC
Wind: light breeze
Calories burned: 784
Average pace: 5:10/km
Total distance to date: 878 km

After more than two years of running at China Creek park I finally tried something new. Tonight Jeff and I drive to Burnaby Lake and I did my run on the trail that circumnavigates the lake, a distance of approximately 11 km. I started at the parking lot near the Burnaby Equestrian Centre and ran counter-clockwise, finishing with a total distance of 11.21 km and a time one second under 58 minutes.

There are two remarkable things about this run. The first was the huge number of black slugs on the trail. It was like a 1950s science fiction movie where black slugs invaded the Earth, except the slugs were normal-sized and not really invading. I successfully dodged all of them.

The other remarkable thing was my time. I finished with an overall pace of 5:10/km. This is a full seven seconds better than my previous best pace and it was also the only time I’ve come in under 5 minutes on the first three km (and the fourth was only one second over). I’m not really sure why my pace was so much better. Was it running in the early evening after three full meals? Was it the excitement of a new course? The variety on not looping around the same path a dozen and a half times? Alignment of the planets? All of these things?

I did my usual — keeping the pace steady and there are several long straight stretches that made it easier to maintain speed (the northern Cottonwood Trail stands out in that regard), but I also had my share of miscues. One time I mistakenly turned down a path to a viewpoint and had to swing back onto the main trail. When the trail turns south it enters a stretch I hadn’t anticipated where it crosses a road, parallels another, goes over a parking lot and generally looks very un-trail-like. It also doesn’t help that most of the trail affords no view of the lake at all, so you can’t use it as a navigation aid except to know that it’s ‘somewhere over that way’.

The trail itself is fairly good for running. It’s not too hard-packed and the stretches over concrete and pavement are brief. There are a couple of points on the southern side where you have to run along wooden boardwalks built over top of the bog but they’re in good condition. It’s all very scenic and woodsy.

I look forward to doing it again, though I suspect it will be awhile before I can beat my 5:10 pace.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km Jul 11 Jul 9 Jul 6 Jul 4 Jul 1 Jun 28 Jun 26 Jun 21 Jun 18
1 km 4:54 4:58 5:08 4:58 5:04 4:58 4:59 5:00 4:53
2 km 4:56 4:58 5:11 5:02 5:06 5:03 5:05 5:04 5:01
3 km 4:58 5:03 5:14 5:08 5:07 5:05 5:10 5:07 5:04
4 km 5:01 5:07 5:17 5:12 5:09 5:08 5:13 5:11 5:09
5 km 5:03 5:10 5:20 5:14 5:11 5:11 5:15 5:14 5:13
6 km 5:03 5:12 5:22 5:15 5:12 5:13 5:19 5:15 5:15
7 km 5:04 5:15 5:25 5:17 5:14 5:15 5:21 5:17 5:18
8 km 5:06 5:17 5:27 5:19 5:16 5:16 5:23 5:19 5:21
9 km 5:08 5:19 5:30 5:21 5:17 5:18 5:25 5:20 5:23
10 km 5:10 5:20 5:31 5:21 5:17 5:19 5:27 5:21 5:24
11 km 4:59 — — — 5:19

The unexpected run

Distance: 10.02 km
Weather: Sunny
Temp: 20ºC
Wind: light breeze
Calories burned: 701
Average pace: 5:20/km
Total distance to date: 867 km

The unexpected part of this run is how it turned out much better than I had hoped.

I decided to wait an extra day after Wednesday’s run because my right shin, though not hurting at all to walk, was a bit sensitive when pressure was applied in the right (or wrong, according to my shin) spot. I have been erring on the side of caution this year to prevent injury so instead of running on Friday I ran today.

Because I had plans in the evening, I broke my usual rule and ran in the mid-afternoon sun. It was 20ºC so not hot but when the breeze died down it still felt plenty warm. I knew after the first two km that I had started out too fast and was concerned that I would lag in the middle part of the run and have a slower overall time as a result. I had also made the mistake of not eating lunch beforehand (I was thinking of having it after the run), which meant I was running with minimal fuel. This, combined with the warmth, made the run feel much harder. By the time I got to the last km I really wanted it to be over.

My hunch on the start was correct — I posted a brisk 4:58/km on the first km and then did the exact same on the second. I then dropped five seconds from 2K to 3K and another four going from 3K to 4K, so I did indeed start flagging in the middle. However, I managed to find a steadier rhythm after that and ended with an overall pace of 5:20/km, a quite good result (third fastest 10K, only 3 seconds off my best run) and a full 11 seconds better than my last effort.

A group of people doing some kind of weird orienteering/weigh-in/whatever thing were annoyingly clustering on one part of the trail a number of times through the run but other than that there were no other unusual events to report.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km Jul 9 Jul 6 Jul 4 Jul 1 Jun 28 Jun 26 Jun 23 Jun 21 Jun 18
1 km 4:58 5:08 4:58 5:04 4:58 4:59 4:59 5:00 4:53
2 km 4:58 5:11 5:02 5:06 5:03 5:05 5:05 5:04 5:01
3 km 5:03 5:14 5:08 5:07 5:05 5:10 5:09 5:07 5:04
4 km 5:07 5:17 5:12 5:09 5:08 5:13 5:12 5:11 5:09
5 km 5:10 5:20 5:14 5:11 5:11 5:15 5:15 5:14 5:13
6 km 5:12 5:22 5:15 5:12 5:13 5:19 — 5:15 5:15
7 km 5:15 5:25 5:17 5:14 5:15 5:21 — 5:17 5:18
8 km 5:17 5:27 5:19 5:16 5:16 5:23 — 5:19 5:21
9 km 5:19 5:30 5:21 5:17 5:18 5:25 — 5:20 5:23
10 km 5:20 5:31 5:21 5:17 5:19 5:27 — 5:21 5:24
11 km — — — 5:19

Book review: Cosm

Cosm is a 1998 SF novel by Gregory Benford. I’ve read and enjoyed several other of his novels, including Great Sky River and Timescape. The concept of Cosm intrigued me but when I first picked it up years ago I only got about ten pages in before abandoning it because it’s one of those books that doesn’t jump right into the main plot right away. In fact, the beginning is rather boring.

This year I picked it up again and finished it and I’m left with a feeling of indifference. Cosm is not a bad book but it is perhaps a badly told story. The premise is neat — an accident with a super-collider leads to the creation of a small sphere, the titular cosm. The cosm provides a literal window to a miniature universe growing at an exponentially accelerated rate within it.

The protagonist of the story is a stubborn, abrasive black physicist with an inept social life named Alica Butterworth. After the accident, she claims ownership of the cosm and returns with it to the University of California Irvine where she teaches and researches. The novel follows both the politics surrounding ownership and treatment of the cosm as well as her research into it. The problem is that most of the story focuses on the politics, with rival universities, the government, religious groups and others weighing in on the matter, while the actual study of the phenomenon is handled in a bland, perfunctory manner, as if it’s just another research project to write papers on.

Cosm ends up as more a look into the battles professors face at educational institutions and less a look at a potentially world-changing experiment. As such, it proves to be a disappointment. It does pull off the neat trick of ending with both a bang and a whimper, though. Benford completists may want to check it out but there are better SF novels out there.