The No Kidding Department: Hospitals are depressing

Earlier this week I accompanied Jeff to the emergency room of Royal Columbia Hospital. His ankle was hurting and swollen up like the proverbial balloon, so we went in to have it checked out. Previous appraisals had made a tentative diagnosis of tendinitis and the recommendation to not do anything that would impact the foot (running, etc.) I figured we’d be there for a good while but the emergency room was actually only sparsely populated. It turned out that didn’t matter, as we were there for three hours, anyway.

The first section — the emergency room proper — had a few people with fairly obvious ailments — a woman with her arm in a cast, a man on a gurney wearing a neck brace, while others were harder to pin down — a fussy baby, a young woman carting an IV drip alongside her. The man on the gurney complained of being bored but had four people other than his wife hunkered around him. The discussion was vague but ominous, with talk of blood and such, though none was apparent from where I sat. They eventually wheeled him off.

As we continued to wait, more people were taken past us, many of them heavyset, all of them looking either ill or bored or both. One gurney would be rolled through slowly, another more urgently. We were eventually moved to the ‘minor condition’ section to wait for an x-ray to be done. While there we heard a woman off in another room repeatedly cry out “Ow!” and “Oh!” It sounded like they were murdering her with pins. I started feeling a little squirmy at this point but she eventually fell silent as they either completed the testing/probing or she fainted/died.

She was later wheeled out into the same section as us, an elderly woman who said she had to keep her feet up and yelled at an intern “Don’t touch my finger!” as he tried to move her from a wheelchair that was sans footrest to one that had one. She apologized to him for the outburst then spent the rest of her time repeatedly asking to use someone’s cellphone, as hers had died. I don’t recall her actually making a call despite being handed a phone several times. She was eventually wheeled off and we heard from her no more. This provided some comfort as she was the only patient there actively screaming.

By this time Jeff was taken for x-rays and I went out to feed the maw of the meter in the emergency parking lot, also known as ‘How we keep the hospital solvent by charging the equivalent of a mortgage payment for 3 hours of parking’. There are handy green arrows on the floor to lead you from one section to another, so I would have no problem making my way back in. This was good as every corridor looked the same and equally depressing to me. As it turned out, the green arrows split at one point and I became utterly confused, finding myself in a room I did not recognize, one that was filled with beds and very sick-looking people and curtains that should have been closed but were not so you could see things you didn’t want to see. I turned around a few times and realized why so hospitals are such a great setting for thrillers and horror movies. I made my way back to Jeff in time to look at the x-ray and see the fractured bone in his ankle. The diagnosis was a plaster cast for the day, an appointment with a specialist the next day and probable replacement with a Fiberglas cast in a few days that would be worn for 5-6 weeks, with the fun bonus possibility of surgery if the healing didn’t proceed as desired. Jeff was understandably less than thrilled.

The diagnosis was later changed to an air cast that could be removed for sleeping/showering, with surgery unlikely, so things ended up looking better than they were originally.

About the only thing I liked at the hospital was the Tim Horton’s apple fritter I bought in the coffee shop. We shared it and it was yummy. Other than that, I can’t say I’m anxious to step in one again any time soon. Those places are enough to make you sick.

In which Joan adds another 500 km

Distance: 7.5 km
Weather: Cloudy, some late hazy sun
Temp: 17ºC
Wind: medium breeze
Calories burned: 509
Average pace: 5:21/km

Today’s result was unexpected after Monday’s timid pace. I started out decently with a 5:04 first km and maintained a good pace throughout, even picking it back up to 5:13 for the last half km. I concentrated on form, landing and taking off from the pads of my feet and not the heels and with about 10 minutes left in the run my shin muscles were starting to feel a bit tired — sore but not injured. Or at least I hope so! As always, I will evaluate again before my next run.

My overall pace of 5:21 note only eclipses the 5:28 of my previous 40 minute run, it comes close to matching the best time for any run of 40 minutes or more. This without especially trying to push hard. I think I am finally at the point where I’ve made up for the months off from running. Here’s hoping I can remain healthy and jump back into the 10K runs soon.

Also, Joan congratulated me for another 500 km. I am now past navigating the planet. Joan has me on a course across the universe now.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km Jun 8 Jun 6 Jun 2 May 31 May 28 May 26 May 23 May 20 May 18
1 km 5:04 5:05 5:00 5:05 5:07 5:01 5:03 5:15 5:13
2 km 5:10 5:13 5:10 5:13 5:14 5:13 5:15 5:24 5:23
3 km 5:14 5:20 5:16 5:18 5:19 5:19 5:21 5:31 5:30
4 km 5:16 5:25 5:20 5:22 5:23 5:24 5:25 5:35 5:35
5 km 5:18 5:23 5:25 5:24 5:24 5:26 5:37 5:37
6 km 5:20 5:26 5:29
7 km 5:21 5:28 5:31

Miniature relay runners, the sun, my knee and a run

Distance: 4.82 km
Weather: Sunny
Temp: 21-23ºC
Wind: light
Average pace: 5:27/km

What better way to show how delightfully absurd our weather has been than to note that the temperature for today’s run was more than double that of the run on Thursday.

I was originally going to run on Saturday but I could feel that ominous ting in my left shin (and my right to a lesser extent) after Thursday’s outing, the kind of ting that usually sees me update five weeks later to note that I haven’t been running and instead have been nursing a shin splint or rickets or something.

With three days off and a warm ol’ sun out for a change, I was concerned about how the legs would hold up and whether my pace might suffer, even if the legs were fine. I could feel both shins as I started out — not in a painful way, more of a sore/still not 100% tuned up-way. That feeling subsided as I kept running, though curiously my left knee (which may be somewhat arthritic now) seemed to bother me more). About 15 minutes in the warmth of the sun felt less like a melodic Beach Boys song and more just hot. Complicating matters further were a gaggle of kids from an elementary school running practice relays. Today was a clockwise run so I was running against them and it’s amazing how many did not understand the idea of left/right when it came to passing by each other. Fortunately no collisions were had.

I stopped the run early at the 26 minute mark (I meant to go a full 5K at least but guessed slightly off) because I was too hot, the kids were bugging me and I was unsure about the legs. I think they’re okay. I will poke and prod tonight and see how they feel after.

The one good note is that my pace did not suffer as much as I thought it would. My opening km came in at a decent 5:05 and my overall pace of 5:27/km was actually a bit faster than my previous (but longer) run. This suggests that the legs are probably holding up, as my past experience has been that a significant drop in pace is one of the sure signs that you done hurt somethin’.

We shall see for certain on Wednesday!

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km June 6 June 2 May 31 May 28 May 26 May 23 May 20 May 18
1 km 5:05 5:00 5:05 5:07 5:01 5:03 5:15 5:13
2 km 5:13 5:10 5:13 5:14 5:13 5:15 5:24 5:23
3 km 5:20 5:16 5:18 5:19 5:19 5:21 5:31 5:30
4 km 5:25 5:20 5:22 5:23 5:24 5:25 5:35 5:35
5 km 5:23 5:25 5:24 5:24 5:26 5:37 5:37
6 km 5:26 5:29
7 km 5:28 5:31

Why does this ad bother me?

Hopefully I can find a copy of the ad because visual aids always help, but in case I can’t, there is a recent promotion from a mobile phone company for a family bundle package. The slogan used in the ad is this:

The family that saves together, smiles forever.

Any proper Grammar Nazi will immediately get his hackles up over the gratuitous comma, but it’s the actual phrase that rubs me the wrong way. First, linking saving with smiling seems natural — saving makes you happy, being happy results in smiling. Logical. But smiling over savings, no matter how fantastic, is a transitory experience, not one that lasts forever. This brings to mind an image of the family all gathered in the afterlife, still grinning away over their great cellphone bundled savings, even as they no longer need an unlimited plan to reach through the nether to scare surviving relatives. Alternately I picture a pharaoh being buried with his family, sealed away for all time under a great pyramid, each family member clutching a cell phone to his or her hand. If they had cell phones in ancient Egypt, that is. Or maybe I’m projecting because of that ancient Egypt episode of Futurama I saw recently.

In any case, the slogan is creepy.

Mobile post ahoy

This is a test post from the WordPress mobile app. I believe I will do this in the future only if I succumb to total madness, which extended use of this tiny virtual keyboard on my iPhone will surely cause to happen.

The seriously soggy run

Distance: 7.34 km
Weather: Steady rain
Temp: 10ºC (!)
Wind: n/a

In 19 days it is officially summer. Today I ran in a steady rain with the temperature at noon hovering a smidgen above 10ºC. This after Environment Canada announced their summer forecast predicting drier and hotter-than-normal conditions for BC. LIARS.

While the puddles expanded on each lap, my run went well, with the first km coming in at a brisk 5:00/km and my overall pace 5:28, three seconds faster than the prior 40 minute run. A few other joggers showed up right near the end but I mostly had the park to myself. The guy I think of as Kung Fu Master, the one who spends his time balancing on the fence tops in and around the park, was there doing his thing and for the first 10 minutes or so a kid about 14 years old, bedecked in rain gear, stood statue-like in the rain watching KFM carefully balancing himself. He was utterly transfixed. At some point he probably realized he was also getting soaked to the butt and moved on.

I had a momentary scare when my foot slipped in the muck on the terrible southeast corner of the trail and my ankle twisted inward but recovered quickly without further incident. About midway through I did have an ULI — Untied Lace Incident. I paused to tie the lace back up and was good after that. A minor cramp showed up with a few minutes left but dissipated quickly. As is usually the case in a rain-filled run, I couldn’t get the iPod to stop due to it being slick with precipitation and ran farther than intended. It’s not a bad thing, just annoying when technology tells you, ‘No.’

At least you don’t notice the sweat in a torrential downpour. Yeah.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km June 2 May 31 May 28 May 26 May 23 May 20 May 18
1 km 5:00 5:05 5:07 5:01 5:03 5:15 5:13
2 km 5:10 5:13 5:14 5:13 5:15 5:24 5:23
3 km 5:16 5:18 5:19 5:19 5:21 5:31 5:30
4 km 5:20 5:22 5:23 5:24 5:25 5:35 5:35
5 km 5:23 5:25 5:24 5:24 5:26 5:37 5:37
6 km 5:26 5:29
7 km 5:28 5:31

New masthead, now with more picture

I finally got off my figurative butt and inserted a graphic as part of the masthead for the blog. As of this writing it is a photo I took at Buntzen Lake during a hike in January. I am planning on rotating through a number of images. I’ll probably jazz up the site a bit more in the coming weeks, though I am undecided on how best to do this. I can’t decide between animated gifs or auto-playing midi files. If only the <BLINK> tag was still supported.

In case the image mentioned above isn’t the current one, here it is below (click for full-size):

Upgraded tubes

I recently had my Internet service upgraded and speedtest.net provides a shiny-looking graphic for the test results. Here it is for my connection:

Not bad. Now I can download game demos I’ll never play faster than ever!

40 minutes of running backwards

Okay, I was actually just running clockwise, which is opposite the way I usually run. Or no longer the opposite now, as I’m alternating direction on each run.

Distance: 7.28 km
Weather: Hazy sun, sunny
Temp: 16ºC
Wind: light

This week I’ve shifted my run days from Monday/Wednesday/Friday to Tuesday/Thursday/Saturday. One reason is just to deviate from routine for a change, the other was to give me an extra day of rest in preparation for a 40-minute run today. Dun dun dun!

I did about as well I had hoped for — my pace up to the 5K mark was nearly identical to previous runs at 5:25/km while I slowed down to 5.31/km overall, not bad for the additional 2.28 km added to the run. My legs were a little tired for that extra part of the run but felt fine afterward. I think I’ll maintain the 40 minute runs this week and consider bumping up to the full 10K next week.

For a change of pace I was not congratulated at the end by the Nike+ program for completing another 500 km. I was disappointed. I’ll never reach 2,000,000 km this way! I’m pretty much used to running clockwise now, though I think I still prefer the usual counter-clockwise. The trail was in decent shape after a light shower earlier in the afternoon.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km May 31 May 28 May 26 May 23 May 20 May 18 Jan 25
1 km 5:05 5:07 5:01 5:03 5:15 5:13 5:04
2 km 5:13 5:14 5:13 5:15 5:24 5:23 5:20
3 km 5:18 5:19 5:19 5:21 5:31 5:30 5:31
4 km 5:22 5:23 5:24 5:25 5:35 5:35 5:36
5 km 5:25 5:24 5:24 5:26 5:37 5:37 5:37
6 km 5:29
7 km 5:31

The plateau run

Sunny
Temp: 13-15ºC
Wind: W 15 km/h

Still unseasonably cool but with the sun out it was more than warm enough out for today’s catch-up run. Despite it being sunny and the last week of May I still saw some guy at the park wearing a heavy black winter jacket. Dude, it’s 13, not -13! As is typical of Vancouver, another guy was sitting at the edge of the field, tanning his shirtless and incredibly pale upper body.

The opening km of today’s run was slower (5:07/km) than the previous (5:01/km) but the end result was the same – 5:24/km, although the Nike+ site decided to round up the result yet again (to 5:25). I’m sticking to 5:24, dangit. And Joan Benoit Samuelson congratulated me for completing another 500 km, the fourth time she has done so in the last five runs. By the end of next month I figure I will have run enough to have circumnavigated the globe. Thanks, Joan!

The last couple of km I was beginning to feel a little tired but was actually maintaining a slightly better pace than the previous run. I seem to have reached a peak with the 5K runs, though, and will have to consciously push harder to improve my times or contemplate switching to 8 or 10K runs. I’ll make a decision by Monday.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km May 28 May 26 May 23 May 20 May 18 Jan 25
1 km 5:07 5:01 5:03 5:15 5:13 5:04
2 km 5:14 5:13 5:15 5:24 5:23 5:20
3 km 5:19 5:19 5:21 5:31 5:30 5:31
4 km 5:23 5:24 5:25 5:35 5:35 5:36
5 km 5:24 5:24 5:26 5:37 5:37 5:37

Complaining about the weather is always good fun

This CBC news story outlines what most people in BC already know — April and May have sucked, weather-wise.

So far in April and May, the mean high daily temperature has been 9.2 C, which is 3.5 C below normal, while total rainfall of 183.1 millimetres is 120 per cent above normal, [CBC meteorologist] Martin said.

While writing this I heard a sudden clatter outside — hail! Again. I go out and take a picture:

The weird streaks in this image of a tree out back are not photographic artifacts. They are weather. At this time of the year one should not be hearing the weather, one should be feeling it as the warmth gently caresses your skin, rather than assaulting it like God’s BB gun.

I’m sure June will be better, assuming the ice caps don’t melt in the meantime and just flip the switch right over to GLOBAL CLIMATE CHANGE RIGHT NOW and the joke about Canadians living in igloos becomes a sudden reality.

A backward run with forward results!

My shin was tinging a bit (tinging is the best word I can think of to describe it) after Monday’s run so I decided to give it an extra day to evaluate before running again. It turned out to be a good decision not because of a potential injury but because the weather yesterday sucked corn dogs, with the official weather recording 9.7 mm of rain. It dried out sufficiently that the trail today was dry and in about as good a shape as it gets these days.

I’m going to try to use a standard format for the weather. I’ll see if I can stick to it. Thus:

Cloudy with some sun
Temp: 11-14ºC
Wind: light

I ran clockwise and was pleased that Monday’s performance did not appear to be a fluke, as my legs and stamina both held up. I shaved a few seconds off the first km, coming in at a fairly zippy 5:01/km and also knocked two seconds off my previous average pace, dropping to 5:24/km from 5:26. The legs feel fine now, so I should be in good shape going forward. If my times remain where they are or improve, I’ll start giving thought to ramping back up to full 10K runs again.

Chart (blue indicates the run was done clockwise):

km May 26 May 23 May 20 May 18 Jan 25
1 km 5:01 5:03 5:15 5:13 5:04
2 km 5:13 5:15 5:24 5:23 5:20
3 km 5:19 5:21 5:31 5:30 5:31
4 km 5:24 5:25 5:35 5:35 5:36
5 km 5:24 5:26 5:37 5:37 5:37