General

Our education system demonstrated in Price Smart Foods

Ahead of me in the “dammit, I’m having an actual cashier serve me instead of using one of those robot self-serve thingers” line at Price Smart Foods the other day was a guy who looked to be in his mid to late 30s. He was not in what one would call prime physical shape so it was perhaps no surprise that he was buying a package of cigarettes (“Du Maurier KING size!” he admonished the cashier who could not seem to find this particular brand and size). Another cashier came along and was able to find the cancer-causing source of addictive pleasure he sought. His total rang up to $19.39. “Just like when World War II ended!” he chortled.

Yes, just like it if you were writing an alternate history version of Earth, maybe, Mr. “Du Maurier KING size”! At least he knew the year had something to do with World War II, so there is that.

In other random news, it was reported that Vancouver received less than 1mm of rain in July. It normally gets around 40mm. It’s been a little dry.

Vancouver Pride Parade 2010

Colorful!

Today I ventured downtown to watch the annual Vancouver Pride Parade, arriving on Robson Street about an hour before the noon-time start. The sky was overcast but there was no threat of rain. A sizable crowd was already gathered in the 1200 block where I chose to watch from. It would be standing room only, something my feet would hate me for three hours later.

Let me start by saying the energy and enthusiasm in both the parade participants and the crowd is great. The parade going on for two hours is less great. The weirdly large gaps between floats in the last half hour that feels like an attempt to pad things out is less great still. Being wedged in like the proverbial sardine with barely a micron to move to your left or right is what one might call not great at all. Still, I was there to have fun and take pictures.

My camera battery died partway through. I was tempted to pack it in at that point but I felt I’d be cheating someone by cutting out early. Mr. and Mrs. Pride, maybe. Plus I wanted to see the VGVA float. As it turns out, it showed up at 2:04 p.m., one of the last entries in the parade, and long after the camera had gone kaput. The boys had fun with their balls all the same.

I must say, though, there’s nothing quite like seeing an old guy get handed a fistful of Trojan condoms and wonder what to do with them. He ended up giving them to an appreciative and virile young guy standing next to me.

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Fireworks redux

My camera is a trusty little Canon point and shoot digital and it takes fine photos for a goof like me who doesn’t pretend to know anything about photography besides “don’t put your thumb in front of the lens” but it’s rather mediocre in low light situations, leading to very noisy images. At night it’s good at capturing the dark and not much else. This preamble is to explain why I didn’t take pictures of the actual fireworks the two nights I went. However, Nic’s camera could beat up my camera and he did take some nice photos, which you can see on his Flickr page. Links below. Click on any image to go the individual galleries.

Spain fireworks display

Mexico fireworks display

Random little things that bug me

I like to think I am a pretty mellow guy and the feedback from others seems to support this. For example, I can’t recall the last time someone asked me to stop yelling.

But like anyone, there are random little things that bug me. Not in a frothing angry hate-the-world sort of way, just in that “oh yeah, this kind of bugs me” sort of way. Here’s an incomplete list:

  • the sidewalk drifter: this is someone who walks slowly in front of you on the sidewalk. As soon as you decide to pass by, the person will drift in the direction you are attempting to pass on. If you move left, they drift left. If you move right, they drift right. They also always walk straight down the middle of the sidewalk so as to maximize the space they occupy. I have seen several drifters whose actions lead me to believe they are calculated and therefore, evil.
  • people who think they are clever by referring to Canada as Canuckistan.
  • The Pet Shop Boys video for “Go West”. The song, originally performed by the Village People, is a blatant gay anthem. The video tries to repurpose it as an east vs. west thing (Russia vs. the U.S.) in order to make it suitable for mass consumption. It’s intellectually dishonest, especially considering Neil Tennant had officially come out around the same time.
  • the flaps on cargo shorts. They always curl up. I actually iron mine after washing them to keep them flat and I don’t iron anything.
  • full page ads on the front page of a newspaper. You typically only see this on the free dailies like 24 Hours or Metro but still, it’s as good as them admitting that the news therein is secondary to anything else, which doesn’t make a newspaper seem all that valuable a resource.
  • ATV strollers, especially on buses. There has been a trend in recent years toward strollers becoming the baby-toting equivalent of an SUV, with huge knobby tires and reinforced seats seemingly more suited to some 4×4 driving in the mountains than taking little Billy downtown to playschool. I have watched several people struggle to simply get these monstrosities onto a bus.
  • running a pedestrian-controlled red light. Hey jerk, the light is red because a person is crossing the intersection. Running the light to save you precious seconds on your oh-so-important tasks is not really a fair exchange for seriously injuring or killing someone.
  • employees who smoke at the entrance to the store they work in. Why do managers let them do this? Do they think walking through a cloud of smoke is the best way to welcome someone into their shop? Also, people who don’t butt out their cigarettes and instead just leave them burning on the sidewalk. Lazy would-be cancer victims!

And many, many more. Again, these are little things. I don’t gnash my teeth and write angry letters to editors over them, I just note them here because I like lists.

My grocery list

In case I ever become a famous author, here is my grocery list from today for someone to put in hardcover to see if it really would sell. It also highlights how unexciting my diet is and why I managed to lose 40 pounds.

  • fat-free cottage cheese
  • 3 hothouse tomatoes
  • 1 head of green leaf lettuce
  • Grape Nuts cereal (a friend refers to it as ‘dirt and sawdust’)
  • Tomato and balsamic rice crackers (this is my ‘fun’ food)
  • Vitasoy unsweetened soy milk (for the dirt and sawdust above)
  • 1 can 6-bean mix
  • 2 tomato & basil boneless & skinless chicken breasts (I usually make my own marinade but got lazy today)
  • 1 dozen large white eggs

I should note this is not an all-inclusive list since I walk to the store and have so far been unsuccessful in growing additional arms for carrying extra bags, but it’s a good overview of some of the staples I regularly pick up.

I am probably one of three people in North America to eat breakfast cereal with no processed sugar in it (zero in both the cereal and milk). I cheat a little by sprinkling a dozen fresh blueberries on top, though. Yum.

There are times when I use dried beans and others when I go for the can. The only thing I don’t like about dried beans is the long prep time (an hour or so), especially when it’s already quite warm inside. If I can (ho ho) I try to buy beans that are low sodium. Most stores offer this now.

The cottage cheese is my usual go-to snack for later in the evening. The veggies are for my turkey sandwiches, which are quite yummy, if I do say so. Eggs are for breakfast, obviously.

What’s missing from this list vs. one I would have made slightly more than two years ago: any processed food, sugary drinks and/or cookies.

I kind of miss the cookies.

Fireworks, Part 2: Spain vs. Mexico

Wednesday night I returned downtown to watch the fireworks put on by the team from Mexico. Unlike Saturday, we arrived after it was already dark and observed from a higher vantage point above Sunset Beach. Crowds that had been pegged at 300,000 for Saturday were notably smaller but still big for the crowdaphobic.

The Mexican display started in fine fashion but then went into a long interlude with minimal fireworks that were keyed very specifically to the music. Someone to the right of us had a radio broadcasting the music and it was very evident the designers of the show had chosen to have large sections of the display timed to the music they had selected. While a neat effect, it meant the display — especially to those without access to the music — was a bit limp compared to Spain’s balls-out approach. Overall I have to give the nod to Spain’s more crowd-pleasing display. The approach Mexico took would work better for a fireworks show that wasn’t situated in the middle of a large bay.

Remarkably I was able to catch a bus mere moments after arriving at the bus stop post-fireworks and was home a full half hour earlier than on Saturday. Although crowded, the ride was uneventful. If I just got lucky this year with transit, it’s the kind of luck I like.

Plaid shorts: I don’t get it

What’s the deal with plaid shorts? At some point in the recent past they were declared ‘it’. When I went to The Bay to look for a plain pair of shorts I felt like I had entered Plaid World. There were racks upon racks of plaid shorts in every possible color and configuration, a veritable sea of plaid to drown in. Oh sure, I found a few token pairs of non-plaid shorts for people who just have to be different and buck the current trend being dictated to us by…uh…whoever is responsible for starting the whole thing. I’d love to have a specific name so I could write a letter. I’d never send the letter but it would feel good writing it.

The non-plaid pairs of shorts came only in two sizes: giant and elephantine, because apparently the average male now has a waist similar to a water buffalo and those who eat reasonably and exercise and thus have a regular-sized waist are a minority that will take what they can get and like it, dammit. I left the store sans shorts (except for the ones I was wearing when I came in. I am not an indecent man, after all).

On a similar note, can someone please declare 3D in movies ‘not it’. This has to be the most unwelcome trend in theaters since they started showing commercials. It’s such a crass move to squeeze even more money from the shrinking theater-going audience. I think I preferred the rumble seats some theaters had when they played Earthquake back in 1974.

Fireworks (the kind in the sky)

Last night I went to the Celebration of Light fireworks at English Bay, the second of four evenings of fireworks this summer. Nic, who conveniently lives only a few blocks away, suggested we head out early. I, not living conveniently a few blocks away, caught the #22 and came downtown, noting the conspicuous steady stream of people heading beachward. As I stood at the intersection of Davie and Thurlow a couple of young guys approached me. One of them asked if I knew where they could get beer. I advised them that there was a cold beer and wine store just a block or so down the street. The guys nodded and thanked me, walking away. The one guy then came back and asked, “What about bud?” I decided not to play cute by acting as if he was looking for someone named Bud and simply shrugged, saying “Around”, which is fairly accurate as far as that thing goes.

Shortly after 7 we headed down to set up near the Inukshuk, which, like all other public art/statuary in the area, had been surrounded by temporary fencing. There was also a row of nearby port-a-potties and what seemed to be a miniature strip mall hastily assembled along the walk on English Bay beach, selling ice cream and glow-in-the-dark lightsabers, among other things. Initially we sat on some of the rocks just off the path, watching the outgoing tide lap up just out of reach but after experiencing profound numb butt I suggested we move slightly back and sit on the edge of the pavement. Much better.

This was the view looking straight ahead from our position, where False Creek meets English Bay. Everything from dinghies to cabin cruisers were bobbing in the choppy water. A few people were even seen briefly swimming, which isn’t the first thing I’d do when surrounded by a million boats.

(click to enlarge)

We witnessed at least three groups of people getting picked up by small boats. The people in the shot below were actually sitting and standing near us for a good while, their conversation bearing witness that the price for a beautiful body is made up for in the brain department. I am of the belief that the guys are genetically designed to always have their underwear sticking out. They simply can’t help themselves.

Speaking of young men with their underwear sticking out, another group had planted itself on the rocks ahead of us. As the day turned to dusk, a couple of police officers came along behind us and asked one of the young men to step forward. As we watched the rock-top interrogation, a small plastic pouch was removed from the p0cket of the young man and he was escorted away for his own private fireworks show. I shall call him Bud.

Looking to our right you can see the rather sizable crowd gathered two hours in advance on English Bay Beach.

Everyone was remarkably well-behaved. A guy sitting in front of us and whose cigarette smoke consistently blew directly into my face left after a few minutes when it became apparent that his friends were not prepared to sit on rocks. A girl to my left watched the fireworks and kept muttering a simple, quiet “Wow” throughout. At one point she expanded on this to her friends: “I really love fireworks.” It was cute — really! The crowd was there to kick back and enjoy the show.

And it was a good show. The Spanish entrant chose to use iconic (and bombastic) classical music — Ride of the Valkyries and Thus Spoke Zarathustra (better known as the music from 2001: A Space Odyssey) but their pyrotechnics were up to the task of matching the grandeur of the music. Last year I saw China’s show and it fizzled out to a limp finale. Maybe rockets don’t fly as high when they’re lined with lead. Spain, however, delivered a rousing series of overlapping explosions that let you know this was the big finish. Most people went home satisfied, I suspect.

Getting out of downtown was surprisingly painless. I walked with the orderly masses down to Burrard and Pender and only waited a few minutes for a #19 to show up. I was home within the hour. Kudos to transit (who imagined such a thing being said by me?) for keeping on top of the giant crowds for these events.

A trio of random websites: the future, the past, the present

A few interesting and random websites I’ve come across or been linked to.

Paleo-Future: a look at the future that never was. I’m a sucker for this stuff because most predictions are hilariously wrong. We were supposed to have baby machines and flying cars by 1980, let alone 2010 (the year me make contact). Granted, some of the predictions are made based more on wish fulfillment and less on using a rigorous scientific method in asserting what is likely to come to pass. Heck, Asimov had spaceships running on nuclear power.

alt/1977 is kind of a reverse take on Paleo-Future’s predictions and instead takes four current electronic devices — an MP3 player, a laptop, a portable game machine and a cellphone and imagines what they would look like if they had been released in 1977. As the artist Alex Varanese writes, “I’ve learned that there is no greater design element than the anachronism. I’ve learned that the strongest contrast isn’t spatial or tonal but historical. I’ve learned that there’s retro, and then there’s time travel.”

Michael Wolf’s Hong Kong architecture: Having looked at how the future didn’t turn out and what the past might have looked like, the final site is a fascinating if somewhat bleak look at Hong Kong skyscrapers, with the camera in close enough to exclude everything but the sheer expanses of steel and concrete reaching into the sky. The effect is somewhat bewildering.

Paleo-Future and Michael Wolf photo links provided by Nic.

A sign of the times

In this case, the times are of increasing illiteracy. Or maybe this is new lingo I’m unaware of. Spotted outside a restaurant last night on the north side of False Creek:

My other guess is that it was a reserved party for private perverts, though it wouldn’t seem especially private being in a public restaurant with large windows and outdoor seating. The little heart stands as compelling evidence, though! The privert people gathered all seemed happy enough.