Did you know a ring-tailed cat is not a cat? Did you know I sketched a ring-tailed cat back in junior high and upon looking at the sketch today I had no idea what it was, except that it was small and furry and possibly a little mean? Did you know that I discovered it was a ring-tailed cat (which is not a cat but a relative of the raccoon) by doing a search for “ring-tailed animals” and coming across a similar image?
Now you know. Hopefully these trivial bits of information didn’t shove out something way more important from your brain.
Note the small backwards check in the lower right of the drawing. I think this was my teacher’s way of saying, “I acknowledge your work but dare not comment on it.” Which would be fair, really. I’ve never been more than a mediocre visual artist.
The scan is actually a photo I took with my iPhone 6, which I then cropped on my PC. Isn’t technology grand? The original image is 5×7 inches. Also, the ring-tailed cat appears to be missing a leg, a recurring theme in my animal sketches, apparently.
Ring-tailed cat, sketch done at age 15.
And here’s the same sketch using the Composition filter from the iOS app Prisma. These filters are so sophisticated they can make my trashy junior high art actually look kind of neat. Did I mention how grand technology is?
Run 457 Average pace: 5:31/km
Location: Burnaby Lake (CW)
Distance: 10:05 km
Time: 55:32
Weather: Clear
Temp: 17ºC
Wind: light
BPM: 158
Stride: n/a
Weight: 157.4 pounds
Total distance to date: 3655 km
Devices/apps: Apple Watch and iPhone 6
With more time than originally expected, I did a 10K to round out the week of running, with the sky cloudy and the temperature 17ºC. The wind was light but felt a little brisk. Winter is clearly on the way as of September 1st.
For some reason my right leg was feeling a bit stiff on the walk to the lake, which struck me as odd as it felt fine yesterday and I didn’t run or even do a walk yesterday, other than trekking around on the job. I chose to hold back a bit for the run as a result, and while the soreness persisted into the run, it settled down and I don’t feel it made any real impact. I didn’t feel uncomfortable, at any rate.
The trail was pretty quiet but two people were blatantly violating the unspoken “walk on the right” rule. I got out of the way for one, reluctantly, while the other opted to pass on my right, which was pretty much where the trail did not exist. He managed to stay upright.
Despite yesterday’s rain, the trail was dry and puddle-free, apart from some water on top of the dam (and I didn’t run on the dam). It did rain after the run, so I am happy to have dodged that.
When running clockwise there is one notable danger point and that’s where Roberts Road leads into the parking lot for the Burnaby Lake Rowing Pavilion. When running counter-clockwise you emerge from the trail and cross the street with a clear view in both directions. When approaching from the other side you have a giant wall of vegetation creating a blind spot on your left–the side where traffic will come in from. It looks like this, courtesy of Google Maps street view:
Where joggers and cars hopefully don’t meet.
Generally this is not a problem as there is very little traffic and on a weekday, who would be coming out to the rowing pavilion, anyway? Someone in a small blue car with no brakes, apparently. As always, when I approach from the dangerous side, I swing a bit wide so I can see any vehicles ASAP and if it looks clear, I run across to the safety of the trail on the other side (it was shortly past that point that I ran into the bobcat/lynx, so safety is a relative thing). The blue car emerged at nearly the same moment and I quickly pulled in close to the edge as it sped by. It was obvious the driver was not expecting pedestrians. He or she was a dummy, not to mention reckless. But I got by and finished the run.
The pace was only slightly off my previous 10K and I’m happy with that. Sunday’s forecast currently looks perfectly pleasant, so here’s hoping it remains such. Almost every other days is a variation of “rain because summer is over, suckers.”
I think I’m special. Are you familiar with the Special Olympics?
Yes. Do you think you’re special in the same sense as the Special Olympics?
I think I’m special in the sense that I’m unique and interesting, perhaps even a smidgen fascinating. I don’t think fascinating comes in smidgens.
Almost fascinating, then. All right, let’s take a tally.
A tally? Yes. This is almost scientific. Describe yourself.
What do you want to know? Start with the very basics and go from there.
Okay. I’m human. Neutral. No points.
No points? No points. We’re all human. Go on.
I’m male. Negative ten points.
What? You heard me.
It’s not like I can’t help being male. I protest. Protest noted. Continue.
White. Negative ten points.
Again? Yes. Don’t feel down. Keep going.
Well, I’m left-handed… Two points.
That’s it? Have you been traumatized over your left-handedness?
Sometimes, when I try to use a pair of scissors. Point taken. Or in this case, given. Three points. Go on.
I wear glasses. Two points.
Not three? No. I’m not budging on this one, either.
Fine. I’m Canadian. Six points. One point extra just because of Trudeau.
I’m also gay. Ten points. Congratulations, you have offset being male.
That’s it? You’ve come a long way, baby.
But persecution still exists. True.
And people are still hurt, even killed for being gay. All right, twelve points. I think that’s fair. Continue.
I think I’m creative and somewhat artistic. A smidgen artistic?
Ha ha, very funny. How many points? Five points.
That’s less than I got for being Canadian, which isn’t even particularly unique! Are you familiar with the term “starving artist”?
Yes. It’s because there’s so many of them. Five points. Anything else?
I’m nice. Neutral. No points.
Neutral? Not everyone is nice but the expectation is that everyone should be. Do you dispute that?
Well, not really, I suppose. Is that everything, then?
It’s all I can think of offhand. Your total is eight points. This gives you the rank of Pedestrian. Do you want to try again? Y/N?
In an effort to get in 31 posts for August (an average of one per day), I have been forced to crank out six posts on the last day of the month. This has by necessity put the focus on quantity over quality, but I look at it as a sort-of extended free-writing session, something that will stimulate my creativity and ultimately lead to something better, even as anyone reading the current results is left confused, angry, bored or a combination thereof.
I promise to put more thought and effort into September’s entries.
My promises don’t always stick.
But I try.
Also, here’s a picture of me with a freaky filter from Prisma applied:
How I miss my green organic hat. 🙁
(Trust me, it really was green, not decorated like the bus from The Partridge Family.)
(The bill split open when I washed it and MEC doesn’t carry it any longer, so it’s gone forever, like the dodo or your favorite dinosaur.)
Oh, they may still be “magically delicious” but what happened to the traditional weird little marshmallow things they used to have in Lucky Charms? You know:
pink hearts
orange stars
green clovers
yellow moons
blue diamonds
Now there are rainbows (which make sense), shooting stars (which make sense if you believe leprechauns are from outer space, I guess), something that looks like a rotten tooth (I think it’s a hat?) and an hourglass so you are reminded that soon it will be time to visit the dentist if you don’t remember to brush after eating this stuff.
The simplicity, the magic, if you will, has diminished in the quest to put in more stuff. Also, the cereal is now being pitched at adults because if kids and adults eat your cereal, your profits will be magically delicious.
While I can’t say I yearn for Lucky Charms nowadays it was probably my favorite cereal as a kid, saving the marshmallows for last, of course. And even with today’s weird collection of marshmallows, Lucky Charms still has the benefit over Cap’n Crunch of not lacerating the roof of your mouth when you eat them.
It’s only two months until National Novel Writing Month 2016 rolls around. Will I take part? Most likely. Will I succeed? Odds are trending toward 50/50 (at best). My current plan is I have no plan, but this year I will definitely make a plan and have it in place one full month before this whole thing kicks off on November 1st.
I’ll report back at the end of September on the status of the plan, possibly while weeping in despair.
Yesterday I spent some time looking at various distraction-free writing programs but didn’t find any that really clicked. I still prefer WriteMonkey and am hoping the sexy new version launches soon, though I am doubtful of that. I could use the current version of WriteMonkey and probably should. Or Word. Or a notepad and crayons. Or anything. It already feels like I’m making excuses. I wrote my first (admittedly unfinished) novel by hand–using a pencil! Well, several pencils. I don’t need the newest, shiniest writing software in order to write.
But I want it.
Anyway, the proto-plan still in development is to have both the tool and story idea nailed down a month in advance. If I don’t I will officially give up before I even start.
Here’s to my maybe success in a month and my maybe greater success in three months!
Technically I had “lunch” in the form of a Clif bar, but I didn’t actually take a break, I just kept working. In part it was due to the weather turning wet and making a walk unpalatable, as I have no umbrella nor the desire to spend the afternoon working in soggy clothes. I was also partway through a large task and didn’t want to lose momentum.
Unfortunately I had not slept well last night so the combination left me feeling tired and gross by the end of the afternoon. I feel a little better now, just in time to go to bed and try sleeping all over again.
Tomorrow I am taking that break. Kids, don’t skip your breaks! If the mean supervisor tells you to march straight back into that coal mine, you tell him you have rights and you’ll work that much harder if you get your break first. Also, you probably shouldn’t work in a coal mine if you’re a kid. Or human. Those places are dangerous.
(Ignore for a moment that you can’t actually see music, unless it’s on a sheet.)
Nostalgia is fun, but sometimes it’s best to remember what was and not what might be.
A new Pink Floyd album featuring the Waters, Gilmour, Mason and Wright line-up. This won’t happen because Rick Wright is dead, for one, David Gilmour would never agree to it for another, and even if all four were around and agreed, I doubt they could recapture their best work. The dream is gone. I have become comfortably numb.
A new Alan Parson Project album. Not one of Parsons’ solo efforts, but a reunion between Parsons and his co-creator of the Project, Eric Woolfson. Woolfson died a few years ago and the closest the two came to working together again was when Parsons remastered their entire catalog. Given the time apart to each do what each wanted (Parsons toured with a live band, Woolfson staged original musicals), I think they might have produced something decent with a one-time reunion.
R.E.M. with the original Berry, Buck, Mills and Stipe. line-up. R.E.M. produced some great material after Berry quit but they also produced some of their most uninspired music, too and it was obvious at the end that Mills and Stipe were glad to leave it all behind. A one-off album with no obligations between the four of them, something that would be a fusion of their original sound–jangly Byrds-style rock–with the best of their more sophisticated later work would likely be a worthy listen.
An album of original material featuring the vocals of Barbra Streisand but written by a strong songwriter, not someone who would write timid or predictable pop schlock. Streisand has an amazing, powerful voice but her rare forays into pop music (Guilty, etc.) are undermined by material that is often pedestrian. I can’t actually think of a good fit here right now because I’m out of touch with much of the contemporary music scene, so insert your favorite songwriter here.
Another Simon and Garfunkel reunion. Just kidding. I would like to see some sort of Simon and Garfunkel-esque collaboration, though. For one half of this duo I nominate Mike Mills, former bassist of R.E.M.
I’m not sure I’d actually like to see this, but it would at least be interesting to behold what Billy Joel would have to say with 23 years having lapsed since his last album, 1993’s River of Dreams. Would he be an angry old man or merely cranky?
Run 456 Average pace: 5:20/km
Location: Brunette River trail
Distance: 5:03 km
Time: 26:57
Weather: Clear
Temp: 19ºC
Wind: light
BPM: 153
Stride: n/a
Weight: 158.2 pounds
Total distance to date: 3645 km
Devices/apps: Apple Watch and iPhone 6
If there’s a word I’d use to describe tonight’s run it would be nice. I was wary of the right leg being stiff from Sunday’s run and conditions were comfy, so I adopted a more relaxed pace. Even so, I still came in at 5:20/km and with no discomfort. It did feel like I was on the edge of some cramping a few times, which made it easier to justify the moderate (yet still reasonably zippy pace). The combo of the pace and temperature of 19ºC meant my heart rate was lower, too, which is always a plus.
I headed out later than normal due to a late dinner but the bonus side effect of that is the sun had dipped behind the trees, so I didn’t have to engage in a staring contest with it on that one part of the river trail.
Overall, this was a mellow, almost relaxing run. I’d practically forgotten what it was like to run without the elements conspiring against me.
If the forecast holds up, there’s a better than 50% chance that Thursday’s run will be soggy. I’m hoping not because I prefer rain-free runs to not rain-free, but I’ll head out regardless, hoping that one day someone will invent technology that keeps glasses dry when it’s wet out.
What better way to anticipate the shorter days, colder weather and incessant rain that will come with the arrival of fall than to throw together a bunch of writing prompts looking back fondly on summer?
Write a story in which a curmudgeonly campfire recalls all the lame ghost stories told around it over the years, saving the very worst for its last dying ember.
Include the following words in a summer tale: canoe, grizzly, bucket, haberdasher, pointillist, gerund.
Write a journal entry in which you refused to help someone with poison ivy because you thought it was contagious. Remember to include how stupid and selfish you were, then conclude with a witty comment about how silly life can be.
It’s so incredibly hot your computer melts, so you try writing a story using pen and paper but it’s so hot the paper bursts into flame, so you try writing a story using a stick in the sand of a beautiful tropical beach but it’s so hot the stick burns to cinders, so you try writing a story using a chisel and stone tablet but then Moses grabs the tablet away from you. Twist ending!
The Beach Boys are your next door neighbors. Write a story about your zany adventures living next to a bunch of guys who won’t shut up about cars and surfing and what is Brian doing in the backyard there?
Make a list of all the things you can do in the summer for less than $1,000,000.
Surf’s up but stocks are down. Write about the world’s worst stock broker surfer champion.
Summer is the favorite season of many people. Invent a new season that would kick summer’s ass, if a season could actually have an ass.
What if dogs threw Frisbees and people caught them in their mouths instead? That would be one weird thing to see in the summer, wouldn’t it? But don’t write about that, write about an ice cream truck that is secretly a kid-eating monster.
Summer spelled backwards is remmus. Write a poem about how remmus the backwards summer would fool everyone by being cold instead of hot and stuff like that. No, that’s pretty dumb. Write a sequel to the story about the ice cream truck that is secretly a kid-eating monster instead.
Run 455 Average pace: 5:28/km
Location: Burnaby Lake (CCW)
Distance: 10:03 km
Time: 54:57
Weather: Overcast
Temp: 17-18ºC
Wind: light to moderate
BPM: 165
Stride: n/a
Weight: 158.9 pounds
Total distance to date: 3640 km
Devices/apps: Apple Watch and iPhone 6
Today was my first post-vacation 10K, coming nine days after the last one, when it was 30ºC. It was also my first run since this Thursday when it was even hotter at 33ºC. The weather has changed and I’m reasonably confident the last hot days of summer are over. With the sky overcast and the temperature a mere 17ºC (which is, in fact, almost ideal for summer running and is perfectly fine even if you’re strolling out and aboot), I set out this morning to find out just how much of a difference 16ºC could make.
As it turns out, a lot!
My pace last Friday was a molasses-like 6:01/km, one of the few times I’ve slipped past the six minute mark. I was not impressed. I was sad. I felt old. And slow. And sweaty. I remember struggling to pull my shirt off I was so sweaty, like the start of some porn scene gone horribly wrong.
Today I decided to start exactly at the 0 km marker and run the exact, official Burnaby Lake Loop, to see how well the markers matched the GPS. When I strode past the 10 km marker the watch showed me at 9.88 km–pretty close, really.
And when I passed that 10 km marker I was not bathed in sweat. I actually only sweated a little, mostly in my favorite spot, which is around the sides of my temple. Why these spots generate so much sweat I do not know. Maybe my brain is mentally jogging at the same time. My pace turned out to be 5:28/km, not only handily eclipsing the previous 10K but also besting my fastest 10K post-injury, which was 5:41/km.
The only downside is the right hip area started to feel a little sore when I applied thrusters. Moderating my pace corrected this, though it still feels a little sore tonight and I suspect it may be a bit stiff tomorrow. I’m not overly concerned as it feels sore rather than hurt.
Given the cooler conditions there weren’t as many people out but still more than I expected. There were a lot of runners, including more cute young male runners than I am used to seeing. I only point this out because almost all runners I see, male or female, tend to be in their 30s or older. I didn’t recognize most of these runners (I see a few regulars most days) and one of the young guys was absolutely drenched with sweat, as if he was in a bubble where it was still 33ºC.
Other than the small degree of soreness in my right leg, the run went very well. For the first time in a long time I actually felt a second wind on the back half and my pace picked up after the usual midway drop. It was nice.
Tuesday’s forecast is currently calling for around 21º about the time I am running, which is warmer but still much cooler and the rest of the week looks like poop from a summer weather perspective, with a chance of rain and highs in the upper teens. I’m liking the temperatures but could do without the rain. I’ll take the rain (to quote R.E.M.) over more 30ºC+ temperatures, though.
