Earrings are weird when described literally:
Punch holes into your flesh, then hang shiny metal objects from the holes.
Boxing:
Two people put on gloves and punch each other repeatedly in the head and upper body. Wearing gloves magically converts this from assault to entertainment.
Wiener dogs:
If you want an idea of what humans will do when genetic manipulation evolves further, consider the wiener dog.
Looking through my “treasure trove” of unpublished/incomplete blog posts, I found one from January 2019 in which I imagined invoking Godwin’s Law on reader comments made on CBC New stories. A few things before getting to the re-imagined quote:
And now the original post:
CBC News headline for an opinion piece that is way too easy to Godwin:
No matter the politics, Trump's wall could provide jobs, stimulus if recession strikes
Godwin version:
No matter the politics, Hitler's concentration camps could provide jobs, stimulus if recession strikes
I imagine you could probably apply this to a lot of things Trump has said, or will continue to say. I, however, am not going to pursue this any further, because I value my brain.
I saw this view over the top of a fence while out walking today and it kind of makes me think of the default Windows XP wallpaper.
The best part is this idyllic view is right next door to a recycling and waste center.
For reference, the default Windows XP wallpaper:
My List
Top 5 Theme Songs for May 2020, Metro Vancouver Edition
Bonus (maybe, hopefully): Here Comes the Sun
The Best R.E.M. albums, ranked yet again by me
Previous list (which I did not check before writing the current one):
I swapped out their final album Collapse Into Now for their 1996 release New Adventures in Hi-Fi. It’s really close, though. Collapse is actually a really good R.E.M. album, especially considering how bored the band had seemed by the earlier Around the Sun. I don’t listen to Murmur much these days (R.E.M. joke) but when I do, it still seems kind of magical. It’s an amazing debut album.
Random things I like
It is May 1st and April was a trial. I do not want May to be a trial.
That is all.
UPDATE, JULY 4, 2022: I am going to periodically update this post with more examples of how "vibes" is being inserted into articles and things where it never would have been before, because it is still the NEW HOT WORD.
The below added July 4, 2022, from an article in The Atlantic. The writer could have written “the economy” but no, we got VIBES happening.
October 26, 2022: YouTube wants me to know it’s refreshed its vibe:
How did “vibes” become the new hot topic (on the web, which is now our replacement for reality, unless your country is being invaded by Russia)? How did this happen? What will replace vibes when vibes are no longer hot?
Am I doing vibes right? What is my vibe? I just don’t know.
Related: When did people decide it was hip to refer to products being offered in different colors as “colorways” when “colors” works just fine?
Why are people so weird?
Also, a fancy cat:
I am tired of being a good person (or at least I think I’m a good person) and seemingly being punished for it.
I am tired of being nice with no result, no effect.
I am tired of indifferent and incompetent people.
I am tired of inconsiderate people.
I am tired of people. I am tired of this world.
I am tired.
I am tired.
I am tired.
April 5, 2022: As the title suggests, this post was originally written at the start of February 2020--a month prior to the official declaration of the COVID-19 global pandemic, which is still ongoing as I write this update. I haven't edited the entry, but thought it would be interesting to post in a time capsule sort of way. I mean, February was kind of better. March, though...
I fell well short of my post-per-day goal in January, but I also got a nasty case of the flu (which still lingers on in a few minor ways two weeks after I first got sick). This took what was a minimal desire to write and squashed it like a bug under a very large boot.
It also rained 28 of 31 days in January, so I may have also have been hit by TRD–Torrential Rain Disorder, in which even someone who has lived their entire life in the Lower Mainland and Vancouver Island eventually starts cracking from the incessant, endless rain.
But perhaps February will be better. At the very least it will be shorter. And perhaps a smidgen warmer.
These would be nice, but not essential.
Assuming there are a) aliens and b) they find us interesting enough to observe, of course. A haiku, in the form of a gentle plea:
Hello aliens We're not as dumb as we seem We need more time, please
This haiku is inspired by:
Sometimes I think, “Wouldn’t it be neat to have a glimpse 100 years into the future, to see what wondrous technologies are yet to come?” but these days I’m more likely to pass on such an idea because I feel that future glimpse would reveal a world in which we (humans) are either gone or set back a thousand years or so in terms of technology due to our inability to stop fighting/killing each other and being so selfish and short-sighted about everything and anything. Sure, social media (nominated for Top Scourge of the 21st Century by me) amplifies all of this and perhaps makes it seem so much worse than it might really be, but I still find myself sighing over how often I see people being so casually thoughtless and uncaring. It feels like the glue that holds us together is wearing thin and everyone is moving toward looking out for #1, which will probably lead to our eventual doom.
Or maybe we will have flying cars and baby machines. Who can say? It’s easy to focus on the negative, so let me try one more haiku:
Hello aliens We are a work in progress Please do not blast us
There, a wee bit more positive, woo.
“Twitter for Professionals”. Just the phrase makes me giggle.
And then cry a little.
